Delivering the Message intended?

Photo by Jayne Harris on Unsplash

Are you aware of what you are trying to say (the message embedded in the words) versus what you are actually saying (the words used and how they mask the message)?

Words are required to communicate, but often they are also used to obscure our message - it's a protection and it happens automatically. As we write or speak, there is a message we are trying to express, a source of our 'reaction', but often, to 'play by the rules' of society, culture, family, to stay safe, to protect others, or to avoid vulnerability, the brain manipulates the message, chops it up, translates and transforms and hides it, embedding it in a bunch of facts, words, and distractions.

Feel like you aren't being heard? Feel like people don't understand what you are trying to say? Maybe the cause is that you are subconsciously hiding the message, and you're so effective at it that others aren't receiving it. Rest assured, we all do it - it's a miracle we can communicate at all!

My point isn't that we should always be blunt - it's to be aware and in command of our messages, words and any 'processing' that happens in the middle - sometimes, it's absolutely right to avoid being direct, other times, we injure our efforts by avoiding it. Knowing our message, and being able to choose when and how we deliver it, allows us to be more clear, authentic and intentional in our communications.

Let's deliver that message!